From Your Son

One Republic - Apologize

Never has there been a morning where I wake up without the realization and consideration of the sacrifices that you two have made; sacrifices that unfortunately I can never make to repay for the lives you have given up in return for a life I can truly live and mold for myself. And although you never once mentioned the suffering, loneliness, and pain you have felt from the alienation you have willingly chosen for yourselves, deep down I know. I understand. And it is this sole epiphany that I come to love you with an insatiable and exponentially-increasing intensity of love day after day.

For every moment I live happily, I also bear the burden of knowing you are not. I hear your whispers of sadness, I vividly see the black void you dwell in within this society and culture and I never cease to cry with you as the tears roll down your heroic souls. As lonely as you feel, I would like you to know I sometimes cast myself in a lonely state and punish myself in hope that I can alleviate the heat from the burning inferno that binds your circumstantial responsibilities, obligations, and unfair sacrifices to me.

Your forfeits are profound, heart-felt, and simultaneously heart-breaking. Your bodies often work themselves to exhaustion but your minds tirelessly automate and continue on with even more valor and energy. Your strength stretches endlessly and your willingness to abundantly provide cannot be measured by none other than the sensational sympathies of the heart; of my heart. You hurt, tire, and silently cry but you always persist on.

When a mother is on her death bed, every child should run to her side without any hesitation, without any other thought other than her beautiful face. And to not be able to is an indescribable hell not even the most cruel and disgustful person should ever feel. But for you to have witnessed firsthand, such an event, is an endless sorrow and reminiscing reminder I promise to keep with me, forever. I know you cried heavily and loudly that night and although we were distances apart, I raised a havoc of storms, monsoons, and downpours of my own tears because I understood then and I still understand even more so now.

Please be patient with me. I am trying my best everyday to become the man I was destined to be so that your sacrifices were not made in vain, your tears unheard, nor pain unremedied. Every time I procrastinate in any endeavor, I punish myself for the time I have lost and more so for how I cannot afford to lose any more. I want you both you see and realize that I set my goals boundless by realistic and practical notions because before I allow you to leave me, this world will know of my name and the reason why I succeeded beyond any measure or logical explanations.
That very reason is because of you.

I will give you your brightest smile for having long taken it away from you.
You will be proud of me.

-Vo Dang Khanh